✨👤 zero witnesses; or… abandonment 101 🏠💥

✶ abandonment 101

…

abandonment?
it wasn’t chaos—
it was neglect. 💫

it wasn’t
one big betrayal.
it was the empty space
around everything.

✨👤👤👤👤✨

nothing ever
got documented.
no one ever showed up.
no one ever said “this matters.”

🦗🦗🦗

—

no.
zero witnesses.
absence did
the real damage.

💀😐

every milestone??
passed like it was
awkward to acknowledge.👏🏻✨
like celebrating me??
would’ve required effort
or honesty✨
or just
✨admitting i fucking existed.✨

🚫 so they didn’t.🚫

yo,
straight up.
i’ve heard the excuses.
but i’ve got—
🙏 two brothers,
🙏 two sisters-in-laws,
🙏 countless cousins,
🙏 three fucking parents,
and
✨✍️✨
nine months
is a long-ass time
to plan a fucking celebration.
but nah. 👏🏻
it also
explains why
✨no one noticed 🤰🏼✨
i was walking around
at the end of my pregnancy
covered in fucking bruises 🔥🔥🔥🔥
because
🚫 nobody was checking the fuck in.

🤜🏻💥😵

—

for real.
when things were good?
it was disregarded. 🔥
shit was treated like
optional events. 🔥
when things were bad???
it was minimized. 🔥
but when things were dangerous???
yo.
everyone assumed
someone else
would fucking handle it.
🔥🔥🔥👏🏻👏🏻

but fuck.
no one did.🔥💫

either way,
i got the whole-ass message.
i was on my own.

and listen,
certain individuals
love 💖🥰💞
to pretend
💥abandonment💥
is melodramatic.
homie, it’s not.
it’s goddamn executive.

—

because what
you actually mean is:
✨i see what’s happening to you
and i’m choosing not to get involved.✨

it’s when nobody assigns
themselves to you.
it’s when everyone assumes
there’s another 👏🏻
goddamn grown-up 👏🏻
holding it down. 👏🏻
it’s when silence
becomes the default response
to danger.

🙌🏻🥰💞

and it wasn’t once.
it was every time.

i learned young
that if i waited
for someone to step in,
i’d be waiting forever.
✨🪦✨
so i adjusted.
i carried it.

before it got bad.
while it was bad.
after i survived it anyway. 💫

that’s the part
that fucks with me.

you learn
that being capable
just means
you’ll be left alone longer.

🌈🦄 ✨

you learn that silence isn’t confusion.
it’s a decision.

i wasn’t strong.
i was unattended.
✨🏚️💔

i wasn’t independent.
i was unsupported.
✨🥀😢

i wasn’t dramatic.
i was reacting to the fact
that no one ever came.
✨👤🚫

that’s the part they
love to forget. 🫥

because when you
adapt well enough, 🤙🏼✨
people rewrite your survival
as independence.
and then
they use that rewrite
to justify doing fucking nothing.

✨👤❤️‍🩹🫵🏻

just me figuring shit out
in real time
so nobody could accuse me
of ✨needing too much.✨

🏚️👻👥

they say shit like
🔥 “no one owes you anything.” 🔥
it sounds sterile.
it sounds mature.
it sounds like
a goddamn boundary
instead of what it actually is:
permission to opt the fuck out.

✊🏻🥺

i guess we were
supposed to just…die???

word. ✨🕊️

like damn,
you don’t miss
someone’s whole
fucking life by accident.

😶‍🌫🫤🙂🕳️

—

that phrase
only comes out
when someone
wants to explain
why they didn’t help.

✨✋😬🤚✨

bro.
nobody
says that shit
when things are chill.

👤📱...💭?

what fucked me up
wasn’t being left once.
it was being left
every time it actually mattered.

✨🎻😔

before it was obvious.
while it was unsafe.
after it was irreversible.

just the expectation
that i’d handle it.
quietly.
gracefully. 💫
without making anyone uncomfortable.

🤞🏻🥹✨

—

and when i
finally cracked?
cut everyone off??? 🏚️💔
they didn’t ask
what broke me.
nah.
they asked why
i was “stuck on the past.”

yo.
i wasn’t stuck.
i was goddamn counting.
and the past???
is right fucking now.
still happening.

🏠💥💫

i was doing
pattern recognition
like my life depended on it.
because it did.

this isn’t bitterness.
it’s fucking inventory.

😢🌧️

i didn’t grow up protected.
i grew up…fucking alone.

and
i survived it.
that’s not a flex.
that’s the fucking problem.

🏚️💔🌧️