welcome to “who tf asked you?” ✨legal edition 🧠 (vowels were harmed in the making of this hearing)

🦋

for real though
elite levels of diabolical—
when a zoom-room
full of adults
with law degrees
treat my last name
like a group project
nobody fucking studied for.

✨

like wow.
we’re live.
on the record.
and the energy is:

😃 “maybe it’s lao?”
😃 “maybe it’s benatro?”
😃 “is she a ventro today?”
😃 “whatever her abuser’s lawyer just said!”

BABE.
this is not build‑a‑bitch.

sweetie.
we are in court.
in front of a judge.
and you opened your mouth
and thought your job
included correcting my own fucking name.

🙃🧻

—

✨ context, for the delusional:

a full-grown woman
with jr. bro backup—
chose that moment
to correct a DV survivor
and clarify her vowels.

like i forgot
what my own name was
after filing a lawsuit
with my fucking surname on it
while raising a toddler
in a goddamn blizzard
from law school
on a shitty hotspot.

🍦🧠

girl.
the real question,
do you even know
how unlikable you sound?

—

like did we—
not get bullied in high school??
or is that why you’re like this.

lol
and all this fuckery,
after junior associate hang-up bro
already tried that shit,
flopped mid‑sentence,
and practically rage‑quit the call.
bless his panicked little emergency exits.

💅💀

—

it’s not giving helpful.
it’s not giving accurate.
it’s not even giving loyal.
it’s giving:

✨ “maybe if we rename her,
we can reframe her.” ✨

like:
🚫 “less wife.”
🚫 “less victim.”
🚫 “less threat.”

🧾🧠✨

…as in, me.
…as in, what?
…as in, WHO THE FUCK ASKED???

🫠💍

—

you’re out here
publicly correcting
a name i share
with the man who:

🚩 strangled me
🚩 stalked me
🚩 never corrected shit

while i’m logged in
with his abandoned toddler
on no fucking sleep
fighting for my life

and you
felt moved
to edit.
my. vowels?

🥴🥴🥴

yo!
if you want his
last name that bad?

✨ marry the fucking mess
✨ cosign the debts
✨ explain the burner accounts + stalking
✨ and show up to court whispering

“she gave those bruises to herself.”

🧾🤡

embarassing.