misogynist dream girl fantasy 🔥: 404 not found
hi yes!
i heard you
were looking for:
✨ the “hysterical baby mama”
✨ the “overemotional wifey”
✨ the “insta-crazy ex™”
…with a ring light
and zero legal dexterity
—
and you were
so excited to meet her.
⚠️ you printed my diary.
you made
⚠️ a billion-file social disclosure.
you brought
⚠️ a whole litigation team
to screenshot
⚠️ my trauma unfolding
✨…in realtime. 🏠🔥
//
(thanks for that y’all!)
🐀💫
—
but plot twist,
bitch:
✨ she doesn't exist. ✨
nah.
yo.
i learned how to
emotionally regulate 🦋💓
a long time ago—fam.
albeit,
imperfectly.
but
damn,
i’m not
out here writing
miss congeniality manifestos 🥰💞either,
✨🤷♂️✨
—team.
—
nope. 👯♀️
you didn’t get
the unhinged girl 💔💍
from that pdf.
you got the
👑 sole-parent,
👑 court-compliant,
👑 rage-sobered version
with
a polite vibe,
courtroom lipstain,
and a
child support spreadsheet
that could
end fucking lives.
🔥🔥🔥🔥
you were
praying
i'd show up
late
with a bad attitude
and a spilled latte.
instead
i showed up
in silence,
logged in before you,
and spoke calmly
while you tripped over
a trial date.
you wanted:
🥺 crying.
🥺 oversharing.
🥺 procedural errors.
🥺 maybe an instagram story meltdown.
🥺 “the breakdown moment.”
instead you got:
🧘🏼♀️🤸🏼♀️✨
“i believe
i paid that fee,
your honor,
and
i have the receipt.
i'm currently
attending law school
(in a blizzard)
with a toddler.
thank you so much.”
👶🏼🧃✨
let that sink in.
—
because
newsflash.💥
i don’t bring this in bad faith.
i don’t bring this to be dramatic.
i don’t bring this to seek revenge.
i brought it because—
…
…
💥 i was defrauded. 💥
🙃👉👈
because
i was actually harmed.
💳✨💫
and i am
still suffering
the goddamn consequences.
🔥 in cash,
🔥 in fucking cortisol,
🔥 and in active captivity.
—
you
needed me
to be:
🦋 legally illiterate
🦋 emotionally unstable
🦋 intimidated by your tone
🦋 wrecked by my own evidence
and instead
i was:
🌼 articulate
🌼 unfazed
🌼 professionally dressed
🌼 and actively hurting your case by existing
🌈🦄✨
—
o.m.g.
y’all!
you built
an entire narrative
about my tone.
my professionalism.
my personality.
my posts.
✨
i built
an entire case
while surviving
the actual devastation
caused by the very individuals
you are still attempting —
with a straight face —
to defend.
✨🥇
your honor,
they really drafted
declarations
about my attitude
while i was
🤫 documenting my assault,
🤫 burying my savings,
🤫 chasing down mail
from three states,
and finishing
law school finals—
while coordinating DV shelters.
🙏✨🕊️
babe!
they keep circling
my sarcasm
like it’s more offensive
than the actual fraud.
✨💫🥰
—
so, wait—
tell me again
…who’s unwell?
