babe, this is the most considerate plug ever✨🎱🔌💍💋
hmmm….
(✨🖕🏻✨)
—just thinking out loud,
sorting through these blocked out memories—
🪞aka: "follow the fucking bagel trail." ✨🥯 💫
(zero hate towards bagels or other bagel officionados—mad respect)
—
so!—
riddle me this,
denver:
what kind of “plug” takes
addies as store credit 💸
for something…
fucking louder? 💥📣
what kind of out-of-town
weekend bagel run 🌃🤫✨
never shows the fuck up—
with any goddamn carbs
but always✨
lines up
with the days
my husband was
documented to be…
✨🤜🏻💥😵
crashing the fuck out
and i got recorded
fucking pregnancy
💥 bruises??
shit
is that
✨comedown math??
or nah?
ok.
so what kind of
regular,
unexplained
❄️⛽📲🔌🏃♂️✨
”gas station run”
suddenly takes
~90 minutes??
but babe,
think:
that’s instead of✨…
what would be…
three fucking hours???
roundtrip for a downtown plug??
hmmmmmmm.
…
because he did
disappear for longer,
irrationally, 🎱🔌✨
closing absolutely nothing—
right there,
directly after or “on” assignment?? ✨
while doing
zero sales “team meetings”
right around
the time the
nightly 👋🏻✨
(realistic: ~15 fucking minutes)
”gas station route”
magically shifts
to a
1.5 hour
halfway meet-up point?
✨❄️😵💫🚗⛽
yo,
but…
he has no money.
don’t be stupid.
💸✨
but babe!
come on,
he can’t be.
because i see the charges—
and he still walks in
with nothing
but gatorade
and a 7-Eleven receipt
like that explains
the random-ass rage
and missing fucking time.
😐✨
hmmmmmmmmmm.
what kind of
fairy god-plug
✨🥯💫
is out of town
“buying bagels”
while somebody else
is white-knuckling the fucking steering wheel,
and evidently
crashing the fuck out
in perfect fucking unison??
naaaaaah.
nah babe!
😐😶😶🌫️🫥
but babe
which “weekend trips”
just so happens
to track the exact days
i recorded fucking assaults???
must be some very spiritual dough.
🥯🥯🥯🥯🥯🕊✨
ok but,
what kind of plug
is “gone” for specifically
the 🤼♂️✨epic january crashout, 🤼♂️✨
hold up but then
ping!
there’s a little
venmo life raft ⚡️🎱🔌🐀
splashed in right after
the storm fucking passes?? 😦—
✨🤬🤜🏻🤛🏻😤✨
but wait!
i got two black fucking eyes for birth??
like, “great talk, champ, hydrate.”
🔥💀⚰️
what kind
of legit-ass “dealer”
drives halfway from source,
meets the married addict
every ~other day,
spares him
the full commute,
and sends him home
fucking “recharged,”
🤜🏻💥🤛🏻
while the cover story
is slurpees and
goddamn sunflower seeds?
and an hour of missing time???
bonus points
for the mid-car extracurriculars
and a quick “you good?” text.
very motivational.
so compliance.
🕊
and the addies?
we’re just wondering—
who the hell accepts
little blue IOUs
unless the trade
is product for product???
currency
has many shapes;
some are 10mg
💊💊💊✨
and stolen from
a pregnant woman’s
fucking lockbox?
yep.
he actually
broke into
a locked container
to get that trade.
lol.
cool.
✨🤙🏻
def not desperate or nothing.
but
i’m not naming names.
i’m just admiring
this community-office alibi:
✨🤬🤜🏻🤛🏻😤✨
the bagels that never fucking arrive??
the halfway halo,
the 7-Eleven fucking fig leaf,
the gatorade communion,
the “oops, out of town,”
the venmo aftercare?
💋
because the
fucking
🔥🔥 punch your
pregnant-wife 🔥🔥
documented fucking come-down??
babe—
that shit
ended in felony charges.
wild how a
✨“day job” ✨
can look exactly
like a day-shift vendor,
and a “quick errand”
can look exactly like
a fucking run.
✨❄️🥄
…
but
no babe,
he never goes
fucking anywhere—
but work!!!✨😵💫📂
on the record
with multiple women
that are just
motivating him!
✨🧱💸🐍🚗✨
…your entire fucking pregnancy…
—stop it.
that could never happen!
✨🤫🎱🔌✨
.
.
.
but weird plug,
huh?
🥀🎱🔌✨
