i've been telling people to fuck off on purpose lately.

not out of bitterness.
not out of drama.
out of data collection.

i finally figured out the cheat code:
ask early.
ask small.
watch what happens.

i used to wait until i was fucking drowning to ask for anything.
but here’s the truth:
just ask.
some basic, simple shit.
free effort. light lift. no excuses.

most people will say no.

and it tells you everything.

like—
since you’re already asking to hang out,
can you stop by and hold something for a second?
can you help me figure this thing out real quick since you already know how?
can you just... show up for thirty minutes before you take?

these aren’t demands.
they’re micro-opportunities to give a fuck.

and almost every time,
the answer is no.
or it’s weird.
or it’s passive-aggressive.
or it’s suddenly “a lot.”

and that tells me more than any lovebomb ever could.

because these are people i’ve already loved—
and they still pause when the energy needs to go both ways.

so now i ask fast,
on purpose.
because i’m done waiting six months
to find out someone can’t even carry
a grocery bag without resenting me for it.

if you want access to me,
show me you can lift.
lift a moment.
lift a mood.
lift your fucking weight.

and if you can’t?
you’re not being cut off.
you’re just revealing yourself too early to make it worth my time.

ask early.
ask small.
watch what happens.
then believe it the first time.